Should I watch Netflix’s “Persuasion”? Yes you should!
If there’s one thing Dakota Johnson is known for, it’s unleashing absolute mayhem wherever she goes, including The Ellen DeGeneres Show and her own kitchen which at one point contained a bowl of limes, which she later revealed she was allergic to. So it only makes sense that Netflix’s adaptation of Jane Austen’s beloved novel Persuasion is the most chaotic adaptation of Jane Austen ever, which includes Pride and prejudice and zombies, Wishbone the Dog as Mr. Darcy on Wishboneand a 2003 adaptation of Pride and Prejudice located in the modern Mormon community.
At Netflix Persuasion, directed by Carrie Cracknell with a screenplay by Ron Bass and Alice Victoria Winslow, Dakota Johnson at her best Dakota Johnson plays Anne Elliot, a woman who is reunited with her former fiancé, Captain Wentworth, after eight years. Anne was in love and wanted to marry Captain Wentworth but was encouraged by her family to end the engagement because he was poor. The film is a beautiful nightmare, a period piece that looks nice but feels like nails on a blackboard with dialogue that looks like it was created by a Twitter meme generator. He feels more inspired by Jane Austen TikTok than Jane Austen. It’s bad, but at the end of the day, it’s an entertaining, if sometimes cringe-worthy movie that showcases the best of what Johnson has to offer.
Here’s why you should watch Dakota Johnson in Persuasion on Netflix. You’ve been warned: pretty much every reason is Dakota Johnson.
Dakota Johnson is ready for 2022
In PersuasionJohnson swept the side, perfectly conditioned bangs and a British accent inspired by the look love, in fact once per vacation period. Looks like she just had her makeup done at a Sephora in Brooklyn, with freshly manicured brows at a Benefit brow studio. This is, of course, a movie, and movie stars have, since the very early days of Hollywood, been made up in a way that pleases them most and modern standards of beauty, but the lengths Persuasion not making Johnson and the other characters feel like the period is so absurd it almost feels like a troll.
Dakota Johnson in the Jim Halpert era
For the best or for the worst, Persuasion breaks the fourth wall, with Johnson looking at the camera many times as if the year were 2006 and it’s the filming of the hit NBC comedy The Office and Sakota Johnson is not Anne Elliot, the heroine of Jane Austen, but Jim Halpert, a paper salesman with a crush on the secretary, a nerdy nemesis and a tendency to side-eye the cameras at opportune moments.
The dialogue appears to have been written by a Twitter meme bot or a teenage TikTok (possibly both)
Did they use the word playlist at the beginning of the 19th century? None of us were there at the time, so who can say for sure whether or not a woman from 1800s England would describe a collection of sheet music as a reading list. I don’t remember using the word playlist until Spotify was invented in 2011, though. Before that, we called them “burned CDs”.
Exes is suddenly a word that exists in Austen’s canon
You almost have to respect the shameless audacity of the Persuasion script. Defying its own tone and setting, the script sprinkles (read: pour) modern language, including abbreviations (exes) and meme formats (he’s a 10) into a film that also features word-for-word snippets of dialogue. word from Austen’s novel. This movie would probably have been better in every way if it was set today, but they said no.
Behold, more Dakota Johnson looking at the camera
Dakota Johnson has become an icon for many things: her love of limes, her lime allergy, and her bangs. But her most iconic moment as a celebrity unfolded in the eyes of the world on November 27, 2019, when she appeared on The Ellen DeGeneres Show and called Ellen Degeneres a liar. Johnson didn’t care to call the daytime host, who upset the on-air actor for not inviting her to his birthday party even though she has been guest. “It’s not the truth, Ellen” made Johnson an instant icon and spawned one of the internet’s only good memes. In PersuasionJohnson gives the camera the energy of Ellen’s death gaze, in a way that almost redeems the film’s glaring flaws, and suggests that she hates this film as much as everyone else.
Dakota Johnson speaks Italian
In a scene that contains the phrase “how can I prioritize self-care with everyone around me constantly asking for my attention,” Johnson speaks Italian while rolling his eyes. Gaming never looked so good, folks. I’m no expert on Italian accents, but Johnson’s Italian sounds better than his meandering British accent.
Hot and boring men
In Persuasion, protagonist Anne Elliot faces the ultimate conundrum: a strange, somewhat reluctant love triangle between two sexy men! The characters in Austen’s novel are engaging, with many layers that make Anne’s situation captivating and dramatic. But in this film that turns Austen’s darkest romance into a short-lived romantic comedy, Dakota Johnson must pretend to be torn between two extremely hot men (Henry Golding and Cosmo Jarvis) who also happen to be extremely annoying. It’s painful to watch but Johnson, unfortunately, plays it naturally.
Basically, you have to look Persuasion because of dakota johnson
You’re guaranteed to have a bad time watching Persuasion but the movie, which is supposed to play in the background while you’re doing laundry or rearranging your closet or fanning yourself during the heat wave we’re currently experiencing, is a beautiful showcase for Dakota Johnson, the only real king to give a damn.